I’m going to be completely honest with you, I am struggling with a blog this week, not necessarily because I’m having a block, more that this week has just gone in a haze of illness, housework, more illness and a thirteenth birthday thrown in for good measure. So sitting down to write this blog, I was a bit like, well what has motivated me this week?! And the truth is, well not a lot really. Obviously the birthday was a major event in our house this week, it also meant that very little sleep has happened this past weekend, let me tell you that a girls sleepover is very different to a boys one! The scene that I came down to this morning was one of remnants of snacks and drinks scattered everywhere, make up/cotton wool pads (used I may add)/face masks and charcoal nose strips all over the tables and floor! But as I was clearing up when all the sleeping bodies had vacated my house, I smiled through the mess as I just knew that the memories of last night will stay with my daughter, probably for the rest of her life, or at least into adulthood, and that makes the lack of sleep somewhat more bearable. 

As it turns out, the girls messiness and fun did me a favour, once normality was resumed in the living room and kitchen, I finally found the first inkling of motivation I’ve found in a couple of weeks, motivation for a good sort out, my bedroom being the main thing on my hit list. I am very guilty of letting my room become a bit of a dumping ground for everything that needs a home finding for it and my poor wardrobe had a whole array of sizing of clothes in there, as well as bags/shoes, generally a home for hoards of crap that doesn’t belong in there. Cue me having a massive cull of all sorts of rubbish, and making the realisation that I have been far too relaxed over the summer hols which has resulted in only a handful of things actually fitting me now, hands up who else has enjoyed the holidays just as much and is facing back to school time at least one size up from the beginning of the hols! Do you know what though, for the first time probably in ever, I actually am not bothered! Yes, of course I am going to wind it in a bit and try to reintroduce something that resembles a responsible diet into my life, from tomorrow naturally! But as I’ve said a million times over, I no longer care what people think of how I look, so this time, I’m making myself healthier for myself, and well when all said and done, because I am too tight and cannot afford to buy new clothes in a larger size. 

Anyway, realizing that I have eaten body weight in bad food aside, I have found today completely cathartic and feel my mojo has returned, and just in time for a busy week ahead. So here’s to the last two and a bit weeks of the holidays. My apologies for this being a bit of a non entity of a post, but they can’t all be winners. Hope you’ve all had a lovely weekend.

Much love. xx

Evening fabulous people, How’s summer treating everyone? Anyone ready for September yet? Or like me, despite a few ropy moments, the new school year can keep at bay for quite a bit longer thanks! Has anyone been/going away for any part of the summer hols? Obviously if you follow my blog regularly you’ll know that we were lucky enough to go on holiday way back in May, so other than a few days out here and there, we’re not doing much this summer, but I am still showing my children another new place, even if it is only for a day. Shockingly my children have never been to Bournemouth, I know right, it’s one of my favourite coastal towns, I am disappointed in myself! But I am correcting this wrong this year and hopefully they will love this beautiful place as much as I do. In fact, it is my long-term plan to make them fall in love with as many countries/counties/cities/towns & villages as possible. 

The first time I left England for a holiday was when I was 13/14 years old and it was to Germany with school, and I made a pledge then that I wanted to travel as much as circumstances allowed me to, and to as many different locations as I could. Now the key word here is circumstances, and these have varied grately over the years, which means I have not even begin to scratch the surface with travelling, but my excitement and enthusiasm has never faded, and as I came out the other side of  my divorce, I made a vow that I would instil the travel bug into my children and as much as my means would allow, I would show them as much of this big old world as I possibly could. Now obviously being a single mum to four superstars means that it’s not easy to achieve this, but I’m trying as hard as I can. I am so determined that by the time they start moving out of our family home, they will be as desperate as I am to see the beauty around the world, and well hopefully I will have managed to take them to a few more wonderful locations. I think it is one of the greatest gifts we can give our children, to know that there is more than just their home towns and the places they have grown up. A few years ago we sat down and all chose five countries that we really want to visit, I wrote everyone’s choices down separately with the date we made this decision and the ages that we all were at that time, I said that when they all turn 21 we will look back at their list and see how many countries they had managed to achieve. I still have these lists tucked away nice and safe ready for their 21st birthdays! I can tell you that there are some interesting choices on each list!

As for me, well when and if all of my little chickens fly the nest, I will be off, I plan on seeing as much of this beautiful planet that we call home as is humanly possible. I know travelling is not for everyone, but this mamma bear wants to leave her footprints in as many wonderful places as I possibly can!

Much love. xx

We’ve been giving thought to the upcoming academic year this week, it’s big changes this coming year, number one son is going into his second year at college, number two son is going into his last year of secondary and making decisions about college courses, daughter is getting ready to choose her options in place for her GCSE’s and son number 3 is going into his final year of primary school and applying for secondary, and I round it off nicely with starting my new job. Like I say, lots of changes in the balance! Now not all of my children adapt very well to change, it goes without saying that son number two finds it the hardest and most challenging, but number one son also struggles a bit too, he is getting better as he gets older, but he sometimes needs a gentle push in the right direction. However I am a huge advocate of ‘anything is possible if you put your mind to it’, and from when the children were a very young age, I have instilled this message into them and told them to always dream big, they can be anything that they want to be. Obviously there has been some interesting suggestions along the way, but another thought I try to keep open with them is that nothing is set in stone and forever, there is a lot of  pressure on kids at school to make career choices whilst doing their GCSE’s and A LEVELS, and that is them set for life. I’ve tried to make it clear to my tribe that it is important to have a loose plan but that it doesn’t have to be concrete, and I am now showing this by example by having a complete ‘career’ change at the age of nearly (whispers) 40!

It’s so important that people don’t lose sight that we only have one life and to have dreams and aspirations is vital to us, whether that be in their career, home life, or whether you’re working through a bucket list, life is too short to stay stagnant in one place/choice. Get out there, see the world, learn a new talent, meet new people, be spontaneous, obviously don’t put yourself in any danger, be safe with yourself, but don’t stay in the same place! I have huge ideas for the coming years and beyond, clearly nobody ever knows what is around the corner, but that is the beauty of life, nobody spends their last few minutes being glad that the didn’t take the risk. My children are fully aware of most of my dreams and hopes, I’ve got a few I’ve kept to myself, because what person lays all their thoughts out for everyone to gawp at. They know of my passion for travel, and which countries I want to check off, they’re aware of the things I want to learn, the point is I am very open with them about having dreams and believing that are completely obtainable if they really want it. 

So tell me, when was the last time your took a risk? What is your big dream? Whatever you want, it is yours for the taking. Dare to dream big!

Much love. xx

Evening all, apologies for my quietness this week, like every other parent around the world, I’ve been a little pre-occupied with being mum and  making some memories with my tribe. But I’m here now and ready to share some exciting news with you all, before I broke up for the summer holidays I was super lucky to be offered a new job, and what an exciting opportunity this is, I will be working at the local college with kids with special needs, some similar to son number 2, and others with different needs. Of course, despite my personal experience of conditions such as autism, this is a very different role to anything I have ever done before, and it goes without saying of course I’m nervous, but one of the things I am learning as I get older is that pushing yourself out of your comfort zone is a really good thing, it helps you experience things you wouldn’t ordinarily and also gives you a confidence that can’t be found in staying ‘safe’. 

So with this in mind, I’ve been thinking about missed opportunities, things we haven’t had the courage to accept the chance to experience. I know in the past I’ve missed out on opportunities or not made the most of  things due to my lack of confidence, but the great thing about the aging process is that you view things in a different light, it gives you the confidence to say ‘screw it, what have I got to lose’ and jump at something that could potentially change your life. And for me, this job is a life changer I think, the possibilities that are now open to me, the chances I may now be able to take, and also the fulfilment of working with such wonderful young people, well it’s fair to say that the excitement outweighs the nerves, well at the moment anyway, ask me again  few days before I start!

And if just to accentuate my point further, by following my example, number one son has also landed himself a new weekend job, which for anyone that actually knows my beautiful soul of  a son, knows that this will be a fantastic boost of confidence for him too, and the start of him grabbing opportunities by the horns and taking on new adventures!

Over the past few years in my current job, I have seen such a mix of people, some that go off on holiday in the spur of the moment, sometimes to the other side of the world, some that are going off on lifetime planned travels, people who have moved over to our country without any friends or family but are the friendliest people, and then to the other extreme, people that have never been out of England, let alone the uk, people that have in some cases never even left this sleepy town even for a holiday, don’t get me wrong, these people are usually perfectly happy but myself personally I just can’t help thinking a life is more fulfilled if you think and act outside the box! 

Now tell me, when was the last time you did something that gave you butterflies or gave you sweaty palms? Life is for living my friends, live the adventure!

Much love. xx

Let’s talk music, I am as passionate about music as I am about movies, and this has definitely rubbed off on my children, as there is usually music being played from all of the main rooms in our house throughout the day. I think this obsession almost definitely stems from my childhood, as I have vivid memories of  Whitney Houston, David Bowie, Bon Jovi, oh yeah and Simply Red playing on our old stereo in the front room. And now I’m passing on these memories to my own children, they have been educated on 80’s & 90’s music, as well as much earlier decades and up to current day songs too. In fact, I’d say they’re educating me on some of the latest releases. With all this said, it’s fair to say that we’re music nuts, but we all have very very different tastes, sons one and two are hugely into the latest rap artists, G-Eazy, Khalid, Bugzy Malone & Drake, daughter loves, well any artist that I don’t basically haha, and number 4, he’ll listen to pretty much anything but he has a growing interest in the songs his older brothers are listening to. One artist we all love, well me more than the kids, is The Script, two of the kids have even been to one of their concerts with me, it is fair to say that I probably have an unhealthy obsession with them, in particular Danny O’Donoghue! I love them as much if not more than I loved Take That when I was a teenager! I highly recommend you give their albums a listen, you won’t be disappointed.

And with the mention of  concerts, I have definitely been to my fair share, Take That, The Script, One Direction, Simply Red, Nelly, Gary Barlow and I have even seen Chesney Hawkes (anyone remember him). I’ve been super fortunate to see some amazing support acts at some of these concerts too, Tinie Tempah, Ella Eyre, Ella Henderson, JP Cooper and so many more. Also I was lucky to attend some of the free ‘party in the park’ type gigs that radio stations used to put on in the 90’s too, I even got to see Craig David at one of these as well. As I’ve instilled a love of music into the children, I’m hoping that in turn, they will have a love for live music too, albeit we may have to hurdles with sensory issues with son number two, but it’s not impossible for him to eventually enjoy concerts too. 

So why do we, as humans, love music so much, I think this is an obvious, as pre-teens and teens, we basically soundtrack our lives with the songs in the charts at the time, I mean I basically had some soppy love song for every ridiculous teenage love drama that I had! And then of course came The Spice Girls, and girl power became the biggest factor in every teenage girls life, every girl thought she was kick-ass! Then you move onto the next phase of life, and you soundtrack more life events, your first dance, the songs you associate with your children and people who come and go from our lives, and of course our ageing. I have catalogued so many songs and I have so many happy and sad memories when I hear different songs, but one thing is for sure, I will always, always be…..thankful for the music.

Much love. xx

And just like that, another school year is done. Some school weeks have felt like years, and others have gone in the blink of an eye, but as I sit and reflect on the past school year, once again, I can hand on heart say that I could combust with pride at how my children have tackled it. There’s been tears, there’s been tantrums, meltdowns, fall outs, and upsets, but above that, there has been laughter, smiles, pride, achievements and a mamma bear saying ‘I never doubted you’. I think as adults we can forget just how tough school can be for our children, we can get lost in how hard our own ‘adult’ problems are, and overlook the issues that they are  going through, brushing them off as juvenile, like they are not actually problems, after all it’s not like trying to keep on top of the bills or trying to fit the housework in on top of your ever-growing list of jobs and worries. But we are too quick to forget that these ‘trivial’ little issues weigh heavy on their shoulders, this is what they are living through, and what may seem insignificant to us, is their ‘How will I afford that phone bill this month?’. Just because this is not something we have to face anymore, doesn’t make it any less serious, these are their life lessons, and the enormity of these, are humongous to them. Each of my children are so so different in personality, and so in turn, their worries are so so different, one is a natural worrier about people close to him, are they looking after themselves, how has something affected them etc, another detests speaking out in front of people particularly the whole class, she doesn’t like to get things wrong and anything less than perfect isn’t good enough, another has to know all the details of plans in advance, he cannot cope if he doesn’t know the exact time of an appointment or party invitation, and another who well, some days, struggles with every aspect of life. And to each of them, these are huge deals, and why shouldn’t they, these are their daily struggles and they are no less important than my own worries.

So to sit here now and reflect on how they have all smashed this last year, on how they’ve some days achieved such great things by just stepping out of the front door in the morning, to tackle the school days head on when all they’ve really wanted to do is just curl up and have a cuddle with me, well these have been some of the greatest things they’ve done this year. They can hold their heads high and feel super proud of themselves as they’ve killed this year, and not just because their school/college reports say that they’ve achieved great things (although as a mum, you know you always love reading how much someone else loves and respects your child) but because they know that by doing that task that they’ve actually been dreading, by not being 100% sure of all of the details, by just surviving the day, these are the important things to them right now, and these are the things I am most proud of for my children this school year. Now is the time you can chill, relax and recharge your batteries, ready for September. 

To you, my absolute heroes, I love you more than forever, and I will always be your biggest champion and so super proud of you for everything you do, no matter how big or small it feels to you, everything you do is huge in my eyes, Keep being you.

Much love. xx

Well not exactly Saturday night, but tomorrow afternoon, the children and I are going to see the live action ‘The Lion King’, and to say we are excited is a little bit of an understatement. I don’t know if I had mentioned at all, but we’re all just slightly obsessed with anything Disney, and well, the lion king is one of our favourites. It has such an amazing cast for the characters voices, and the adverts are just awesome, so we are all very much  looking to another afternoon at the cinema. 

I know I have mentioned this already, but I’ve just signed up to Cineworld unlimited membership for all of us, and we have definitely been making the most of it, we are huge fans of movies, and all of  us have such a variety of favourites, and also series of films. I mean the films that we have collected is so vast, I mean we have The Twilight saga (obviously), The Star wars series, The Fast and Furious collection (naturally), the list is endless. We have Netflix, Sky Movies, Amazon prime movies, plus the biggest dvd/blu ray collection ever, it is fair to say that we like films!

The last few years have been phenomenal for movies, and the next few are looking pretty immense too. And with such good films being made year on year, and with catching up with some of the best films made from years gone by recently, I’ve been mulling over the best movies ever made. Now prior to the eighties, my knowledge is somewhat limited, but I do know that one of my favourites was made in 1961, it is of course ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’, Audrey Hepburn is an absolute icon, I love her, she is the epitome of classic beauty and elegance. I am a sucker for an iconic film, so it goes without saying, I love love love most of the movies from the eighties, Top Gun, Dirty dancing, The Goonies, Never Ending Story, The Breakfast Club, all absolutely amazing films, and most I have introduced to my children. Then the decade of my teens, the nineties, granted, this wasn’t the most amazing time for the movie industry, but there was a few greats produced, well in my opinion, The Crow, The Craft and of course Aladdin! It was in the noughties that more greats were produced, The start of both The Harry Potter films and The Fast and the Furious franchise, P.S I Love You and the start of the Marvel movies. And of course back up to now, and we are still seeing some of the very best being produced every month! We are waiting with bated breath for Fast 9 due out next year!

So whilst I sit here watching the Harry Potter films again, I’d love to know, what are your favourite movies? Do you have any very favourite actors/actresses? I definitely have mine, with the fast and marvel films in my collection of favourites, I’d think that was obvious! Whilst I now we’ve previously covered Disney films, please do share your most loved movies with me. Whatever they are, I hoe you’re enjoying a classic this evening.\

Much love. xx

When I say ‘Summer holidays’, what’s your immediate thoughts? Are you super excited at all of the adventures that you will have with your children, are you looking forward to just a chilled out month and a half and making the most of not having any plans, or are you absolutely dreading finding something to do to keep the little cherubs entertained enough not to kill one another. Rest assured, over the years I have felt each and every one of these things. In the early days of being a single mum, I felt just a euphoria at the thought of six weeks with my beautiful children, they are of course one of the main things that got me through my dark days, so the very idea of spending such a long interrupted period of time with them, was just amazing. But of course, as they get older, they need more complex and expensive activities to keep them entertained, and of course, throw in son number twos increasingly challenging behaviour, summer holidays began to be something that I started to dread. Fast forward a few years, to a time where my children are more independent and don’t need entertaining every hour of every day, the summer holidays are a time that children and I can really enjoy together again. Of course, they haven’t actually broken up yet, so I may completely retract that statement after the first five thousand arguments about whose stolen whose breathing space!

As I type this I am mentally putting a list of things that we can do together over the six weeks off, in previous years, we’ve done some ace things and created some memories that will last a whole lifetime, things as massive as a holiday to Crete, to as simple as picking wild blackberries and using them in a good old-fashioned crumble (actually this was one of my all time favourite memories with them). The point is, you do not have to spend a fortune to make the children happy, obviously a trip to an amusement park is always going to go down well with them, but I know that a simple picnic in the park and a game of crazy golf and football has also been a highlight with my troops. Your children, whilst they may not show it at the time, will always treasure and be grateful for the activities that you actually take part in with them. One of our favourite things to do, is to visit the free museums in the city close to where we live, then a picnic and an ice cream, and that is such a cheap thing to do and the kids love it. So when planning, if you are a planner, always remember that expensive doesn’t always mean quality.

However you’re feeling going into these holidays, whether you’ve a fully prepared itinerary, or you are just winging it day by day, just remember, it won’t last forever, even if it feels like it sometimes, and when you’re celebrating or commiserating their return to school in September, they’re only this age once and you can’t get these years back, make the most of every day, these memories will stay with you forever. So here’s to sunny summer!

Much love. xx

As I write this, I have been relegated to my bedroom whilst I have four burly teenage lads take over my living room to have a long overdue catch up, and in all honesty, I am absolutely loving this scenario right now. Tonight son number one has three of his oldest mates around for pizza and beer and a good old-fashioned ‘lads night in’. These boys (well they’re technically men now), have been friends since they were three years old, and have been through thick and thin together, they’ve helped each other through hard times and enjoyed times of complete joy and laughter, and not once have they had any fall outs or cross words amongst one another. Their friendship is genuinely quite enviable, and in times where friendships are on the whole, quite superficial, theirs is rare. 

Whilst I listen to them all downstairs, laughing, chatting about where they all are in their lives, and I’m sure as the beers flow a bit, the conversation will probably progress onto subjects that I am not so comfortable in listening to, but it’s making me reminisce over my own friendships, past and present. And I am truly blessed that I am still in contact with a couple of friends that I also had at the age of three, also friendships of several years, who, even though I do not see regularly, and can sometimes goes days/weeks without speaking to in person or even by phone, these are like roots in my crazy life. And I realise how lucky I am in the main to have such loyal people in my life. Of course, thinking back, it’s not without a tinge of sadness of friendships that have been lost along the way, people who are no longer with us, or friends that have moved such a distance, it’s just not possible to maintain the friendship that we would like. I look at the friendships that all of my children have, and I am so pleased that, I think they all have at least one friend, that will be a friend for life. I’m excited for all the future friends that they and I will make over the years to come, some will come and go, but I have absolute faith that they will all have at least one or two solid friendships that will be with them for life. 

As I prepare for the summer holidays with my children, and I am blessed that I am in a position that I am able to enjoy the whole six weeks off with them, I am super excited for the new memories that we will all make with our friends. I am the first to admit that I can be a bit rubbish at meeting up with everyone, but during the summer hols, I like to try to make up for that, and I am even more fortunate that my children get on well with my friends children too, so that makes making memories even better! Life is always hectic, and it is easy to lose track of time when it comes to friends sometimes, but whilst the fair weather friends will let this be a hurdle, true friends will see beyond this and say ‘hey, it’s ok, I’ll always be here’, and these my friends are the friendships that last the test of time. 

However you’re spending this weekend, I hope you’re lucky enough to know that friends are the family we get to choose.

Much love. xx

 

 

This week has been a bit of a doozer in just, well life. I wasn’t going to actually write a midweek blog this week, but not all my posts can be upbeat or have deep meaning, sometimes life just isn’t all that! And this week has tested me on many levels, it’s been one of those weeks where everyone has some kind of emotional ‘issue’  going on, work is stressful, and time is working against me, and I’ve had to pull on every ounce of my inner being to be the ‘grown up’ and be there to help and comfort each of my munchkins (my eldest detests this nickname) through their individual crisis’ and deal with my own shit. And well here we are, we’ve almost survived another week and we’re only 1 week and 1 working/school day away from the summer hols! 

I’m taking every positive I can from this week, and as it draws to a close, I am currently sat watching Stranger Things season 3 with my eldest, and to be clear, I have never seen season 1 or 2, but am now slightly addicted to it and for the first time ever, I actually like Winona Ryder in a role, we have all become cineworld unlimited members after putting it off forever, so the summer hols are going to be EASY now, and we are all going into the weekend feeling a little happier and a little more chilled. 

So this is an extremely short blog post, and there is no real point to it, but that is life right? Tomorrow is another day the summer hols are in touching reach, and I have at least reached the end of my to do list for today and everyone is going to bed happy. So for now…

Much Love xx